From the moment we come into the world, from the moment we come out of the comfort of our mother's womb, we want things to be a certain way. We crave a sense of control in our environment. To some extent, this is driven by our survival instincts. Our minds and bodies seek the familiar so we can predict our survival.
Over the years and generations, this instinct of survival becomes stronger and spreads to other areas of life. It's no longer enough to stay safe and have the basic human needs met, we also want to be able to control other areas of life that we deem important.
Our experiences in action and reaction principles have embedded a deep belief in us – that we can control our lives. We live in the illusion that every aspect of our lives is in our control. If we just plan meticulously enough we can direct the course of our lives.
We can bring things into our consciousness through the principle of the law of attraction. We can chart a path of our lives, sure. But it's seldom because we can control everything. The reality is, we cannot control the circumstances and the people around us. We can only control how we respond to those circumstances. If we spend the better part of our lives trying to control external situations, we are in for a rude awakening.
The Universe works in mysterious ways and we are a tiny part of the universe. We are here to experience the magnanimity of it, to revel in its glory. When we give up the need to control every aspect of our lives, when we become comfortable with chaos, ironically, we develop a stillness inside of us that is unshakable. You realize that the only way to cultivate stillness within is to accept the chaos on the outside.
This stillness within comes from the realization of two major truths:
You cannot control what happens to you.
When you are able to accept that everything happens for a reason, when you know that you cannot control everything in your life, you come to the strong realization that you can control your reaction to what happens to you. And that is the only thing that really matters. How do you react to the situation you've been put into? When your thinking stems from this train of thought, you develop a sense of calm within you. You stop living under the disillusionment that you can control everything and develop inner calm.