Accepting Chaos to Cultivate Inner Calm

Why letting go of control of the outside world is the only way to develop a deep sense of calm and stillness within.

By Varangi ~

Developing stillness inside Lifeism

From the moment we come into the world, from the moment we come out of the comfort of our mother's womb, we want things to be a certain way. We crave a sense of control in our environment. To some extent, this is driven by our survival instincts. Our minds and bodies seek the familiar so we can predict our survival.

Over the years and generations, this instinct of survival becomes stronger and spreads to other areas of life. It's no longer enough to stay safe and have the basic human needs met, we also want to be able to control other areas of life that we deem important.

Our experiences in action and reaction principles have embedded a deep belief in us – that we can control our lives. We live in the illusion that every aspect of our lives is in our control. If we just plan meticulously enough we can direct the course of our lives.

We can bring things into our consciousness through the principle of the law of attraction. We can chart a path of our lives, sure. But it's seldom because we can control everything. The reality is, we cannot control the circumstances and the people around us. We can only control how we respond to those circumstances. If we spend the better part of our lives trying to control external situations, we are in for a rude awakening.

The Universe works in mysterious ways and we are a tiny part of the universe. We are here to experience the magnanimity of it, to revel in its glory. When we give up the need to control every aspect of our lives, when we become comfortable with chaos, ironically, we develop a stillness inside of us that is unshakable. You realize that the only way to cultivate stillness within is to accept the chaos on the outside.

This stillness within comes from the realization of two major truths:

You cannot control what happens to you.

When you are able to accept that everything happens for a reason, when you know that you cannot control everything in your life, you come to the strong realization that you can control your reaction to what happens to you. And that is the only thing that really matters. How do you react to the situation you've been put into? When your thinking stems from this train of thought, you develop a sense of calm within you. You stop living under the disillusionment that you can control everything and develop inner calm.

The universe has your back.

This is the ultimate form of surrender. When you believe that the universe is kind and benevolent, you cultivate a lifelong attitude of gratitude and calm. when you know that a force like the Universe is with you, there is nothing to fear. 

You start feeling one with the universe. You understand that you are part of something bigger. Your ego starts becoming smaller and your consciousness grows. You stop experiencing the separation from the world and feel connected to everything and everyone.

When you experience the universe in this way, with a deep sense of oneness and knowing, things on the outside stop bothering you. You stop trying to make things happen. Resistance in your life decreases and abundance and love increase.


Quote by Deepak Chopra - Lifeism

In this state of being, it's not that you don't experience emotions or you don't have feelings. You still have them. Pain, sadness, and disappointment are not eliminated. You just experience them on the surface. Because deep within there lies a belief that everything is going to be okay. Because Universe has your back. Living from this truth sets us free to pursue the life we really want. We no longer worry about the judgment of others. We don't think about what "they" will say. We live our own truth. And when things go wrong, we come back to that truth and being. Because it has percolated to each cell of our body.

This sense of deep calm and stillness, especially when things are falling around you is extremely difficult to develop. It is a process that takes time. While we all have experienced this feeling at some point in our lives, it's not necessary that we feel like this all the time. Just like any muscle in our body, we need to develop it. We need to work on it. This often happens in stages.

If you are interested in learning how to grow spiritually to get to this level of inner stillness, Michael Beckwith has developed a wonderful way to understand the four stages of spiritual growth. We hope that this article helped you, let us know in the comments how you develop this muscle and stillness within you. Do you have a meditation practice? A spiritual practice? We'd love to hear from you.

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